What a moron

Did I ever tell the story of the guy who worked here for one day?

First, the backstory.

We have a web department section of our company. And we used to have a guy who worked here who was pretty smart and did all of the coding and database type stuff. Problem was, he was addicted to pain killers. So you could pretty much count on walking by his office and see him completely passed out in front of his computer. Or you would talk to him and his words were totally slurred. He bragged how he would get prescription drugs over the internet easily and would "convince" you he needed them because of his laundry list of ailments.

He had my boss totally snowed because he was the kind of double talk. So every time you went to talk to him, he would talk you in circles until you got annoyed and walked away. His coworker, with whom he shared the office, couldn't stand him and basically only talked to him when he had to.

One day he was almost fired. He came in completely stoned off his ass on whatever he was taking that day. He was stumbling through the office and just incoherent. (Oh and he drove himself to work like that.) And my boss finally had it with this behavior. My boss freaked out on him and told him he needs help and called the guys wife to come and get him. He told him not to come back. The guys wife came in and pleaded screaming at my boss saying, you know he is sick and needs help. My boss had had it and told her to get him out.

He was out for like a week. He came back more lucid and it seemed like everyone forgot about it, or just didn't talk about it.

A few months later, he gave his notice because he found another job. And we were down to one web guy.

So for months we have had only one guy working in the web department.

About 2 or 3 months ago, they started interviewing to fill the second spot. Basically because the one guy couldn't go on vacation or be sick because they wouldn't have anyone to update the sites that they host. So they found this one guy who apparently owned his own company and would come in with his clients and help build the business more.

He started coming in 2 weeks before his start date to observe what was going on here. I didn't like him from the first day I saw him. He was one of those people who stares at you when you are talking to a group of people and as soon as you look at him he looks away. He was cocky, and pushy, and very in your face. He would come into our department and basically interview us, and we don't even work in his dept. So I did as I usually do, I ignored him because he had no bearing on my work or life.

So he started work on a Monday. He came into our department with my boss to introduce himself. He said to us, when you have free time (which we almost never do) come over to the web department and we can "brainstorm". To which my boss said, um no they don't have much free time, if you want to them to work with you, you talk to me and we will schedule it in. (Shot down right out of the gate)

Then we hear him saying things like lets get rid of these file cabinets and knock out this wall to combine the departments (WTF!!?) And then we hear he had an idea to keep us from leaving for lunch, have a company lunch so we can brainstorm. (WTF?!? I am 31 yrs old and someone is going to tell me when and I take my lunch break?!) He was on his cell phone all day walking up and down the halls while he talked.
He was one of those people that comes up and says things like "how you feelin?" and he would hi five people.

So he was in meetings and on the phone all day Monday. Tuesday comes around and he is there. My boss called him into his office for a meeting. Around 10am we get an office memo email saying he is no longer with the company. LOL!

Turns out he actually had the balls to ask to see my bosses books. After working here less than a day.

We all got a huge laugh out of it.