Wednesday, November 28, 2007

Oops, I think

In my office we have a lot of sales people. Only a few of them are worth their salt.

One of them is a guy, who as an adult, goes by the name Jimmy. He is a complete moron and I don't know how he functions on a day-to-day basis. Dealing with him is like dealing with a 4 yr old. He drives a Jaguar, because his wife's family is wealthy, and from time to time you can see him filling in scratches with a Sharpie marker. He has twins but only has a picture of one of them on his desk. Why you may ask? Because, and I quote, "The other one looks just like that." He is jewish but whistles Christmas songs, year round. And to top it all off when our alarm system beeps when the front door opens and closes, he sits there and mimics the sound. A completely dolt.

The other one is a woman who has got to be in her late 60s, at least. She is a 4'8" frail, fretting yenta grandmother who makes us all crazy. She is constantly on the verge of tears when one of her jobs isn't working out. And all of her jobs end up screwy. Most people can't stand her and don't understand why she is still working. We all would like her to just retire and get out of the way.

So the other day a bunch of us were in the back room and something about her came up. And it was that one of our sales guys referred her to one of our vendors, and he thinks that vendor won't talk to him anymore now. So the jokes started flying and I said why is she still here if she is so annoying and a nuisance? And another sales guy said we are just waiting for her to die, even the boss is waiting for it at this point. And then I said well winter is coming, it would only take a little slip on the ice and she would probably break a hip. Or someone would have to hip check her and she would go down. Laughing ensued and a few more jokes that I can't remember. And that was that.

I was heading back to my desk and I heard her in her cubicle, which is about 15 ft away from where we were joking, and I think she may have heard.

And that's the oops...

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