Thursday, October 25, 2007

Sleep Deprived

I think it a man's secret purpose in life is to ruin the sleep of the women they share bed with.

The man couldn't sleep last night. So instead of getting up and maybe going downstairs to let me sleep, he tossed and turned, flipped and flopped, threw the covers off, pulled them back on, ripped them off of me, for hours. It sucked.

We have one of those Beauty Rest jobbies too. You know the ones where the commercial shows the person laying comfortably still while someone next to them jumps on the bed. Or the one where they show a glass of wine sitting on the bed and they drop a bowling ball next to it, and the glass miraculously doesn't fall over. This commercial is sheer bullshit! Every movement sent me bouncing and shaking.

Then he was hot, so the sheets were torn off of me and onto the floor. Then somehow, Mr. I'm hot, was ON MY SIDE!!!!!! with his elbow pushed into my arm. We have a California king and he still manages to take up the whole bed. Then he says he deserved 3/4 of the bed because he is bigger. This leaves me with about 2ft of bed width to sleep on.

1 comment:

Only me said...

I'm guilty as charged. It is my mission to do that shit.